1.                  Old School Sitcoms seemed to have a mandatory “serious” episode every once in a while.

Being an insomniac gives me the unique opportunity to fade off to sleep in the company of Nick at Nite or TV Land, and wake up in time to experience the shift in programming to Spongebob Squarepants.  Nickelodeon must be the happiest channel on TV…wall to wall comedy for adults to adolescents.  So with my remote secured tightly to my chest nearly every night like the digital teddy bear it is, I’ve seen enough episodes to discover that our “classic” sitcoms seemed to have felt the responsibility of addressing important life lessons in the midst of humorous teenage plans gone awry. 

Right when you expect to see young Arnold and Willis deliver another catch phrase that somehow never got old, be sure to look out for the child molester at the bike shop looking to change the entire meaning of “Whatchu Talkin’ About?”  The Fresh Prince got shot in front of an ATM while trying to protect his cousin Carlton that he seemed to hate in the early episodes.  Steve Urkel got his punch spiked and nearly fell off of a high rise apartment rooftop simply because some bullies wanted to have some fun with alcohol. 

This stuff was taken as serious material when the original scenarios aired back in the day, so what happened to our beloved sitcom characters scaring us straight?  Maybe the writers and producers of these kinds of shows realized how uncomfortable their live studio audiences were.  With expectations for a good belly laugh, they got blindsided by stories of gun violence, inappropriate advances, and underage drinking.  Is this comedy or traumatic preparedness? 

 

2.                  When parents have twins, is it so mandatory for the kids’ names to rhyme that they’ll sometimes sacrifice one of their new children’s dignities?

We all know how it works.  When people have twin boys, they dress them up in identical cheesy blue sailor outfits.  Girls get the pink flowery dress treatment.  We expect them to say the same word in unison at all times while everyone gets a good, hearty, belly laugh in amazement that these two can “read each other’s minds.”  Hey, if Tia and Tamara of the old sitcom “Sister, Sister” can find each other after 14 years of never knowing each other existed, all twins MUST have a special bond. 

In order to put the finishing touches on irrationally making these two humans inseparable, many parents like to make their twins’ names rhyme.  Bill & Phil, Abby & Gabby, and John & Ron.  As if it wasn’t already enough of a hassle for parents to agree on one name for one baby, they have to argue over which rhyming names they will select.  I can always tell the lazy parents that found one good name they liked and simply made up another unheard of name to rhyme with the normal one.  While the new mother exclaims, “Oh, I’ve always wanted to name my son Roderick, after my father” a serious problem is encountered when Rod’s twin brother enters the world just minutes later.  Since mandatory rhyming can’t be violated, with a shrug and a wrinkled forehead, the parents invent Loderick as the natural choice for the poor little chump. 

Once Lod is old enough to realize that his name was simply a creation of convenience to accent his brother’s recognizable and well thought-out name, he should hold a grudge against his unimaginative parents and more popular brother who owns the name people can relate to.  

 

--JJJ

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